The Case of NonRomantic vs Unromantic
by trxr4kids
Summary: Non-romantic and unromantic...both are are awkward sounding words. Troy/Abed


The television was set to the perfect volume. The socks were off, the couch was uneven and the falafel was cooling on the small counter. Sure his day wasn't too deserving of this luxurious treatment and homework assignments had yet to be attempted, but what the hell; everyone needed to relax once and a while. Granted, some relaxed more than others…some were in a perpetual state of relaxation; but this was all that was need for the moment and contentness sunk into the atmosphere as he settled into the lumpy couch. Opportunely, this was the perfect moment for the phrase "Too good to be true" to manifest itself.

There were three solid _**thuds**_ on the door and Different Strokes was, yet again, interrupted that week. With a steady urgency, student and aspiring director, Abed Nadir rose to identify his visitor. He opened the door quickly to reveal an extremely distraught Troy Barnes. Nervousness, disappointment, depression, and a vast array of other negative emotions danced across his face, making the same sickening knot form in Abed's stomach every time he saw that Troy was upset. _Wait. What day was this?_...Friday. It was Friday already and Abed had recklessly lost track of his days. Wordlessly, he moved to the side and allowed the shorter male to heartbreakingly shuffle in with his metaphorical tail tucked between his legs.

Abed had learned by now to never ask. With the first few occurrences, a "How did the date go?" seemed like a harmless enough way to begin the night. That question was a weapon though. He saw it pierce right through him countless times and tried to erase the image of him wincing and giving a mumbled "Not good." It broke his heart; not many things did, but _**that**_ face destroyed him every time. So he refrained from mentioning it. The word "_**date**_" would never pass his lips in Troy's presence. Troy had flopped face-first on the couch leaving his legs to dangle haplessly over the arm like a child. Abed watched for a moment and wondered if it was a good idea to have muted the television before answering the door. Stifled, staggering breaths from the couch cushion somberly sprinkled the silence. Abed calculated the situation quickly.

"Different Strokes is on if you wanna wa-"

"_AbedIfucking__**blew**__ittonightman_." His voice was strained and muffled against the faded upholstery.

"…I think this is the episode where Willis and-"

"_**Abed**_ ." Troy threw a pleading look over his shoulder which caused Abed's heart to momentarily stutter. Without another breath, Abed was by his side.

"I'm sorry." He learned that this phrase was a lifesaver. If used with sincerity, saying sorry was definitely a scapegoat for delving into a problem. He was apologizing for not knowing what to say, for whatever the hell happened, for the world being so damn _**hard**_ sometimes for the young jock. He sat down on the little sliver of couch that Troy was not occupying. Other than the occasional sniffle (Troy Barnes did _**not**_ cry, but had sadness-based allergies from time to time), silence had once again became master of the room. Abed placed his hands in his lap and sat erect. He hated not being an expert on these things. He wanted to relate to Troy in all aspects of his life, but with this he was always left speechless, helpless, and dumbfounded. It was such a delicate procedure. A person on an emotional tight-rope relying on one word to either save them or send them tumbling to their death… It was an extreme amount of pressure and although Abed understood the importance of learning how to communicate in this vernacular: it was _**never**_ _**consistence**_. One thing would be right one day and completely insulting the next. Abed was lucky enough to have a friend that understood his limitations, but that didn't make the broken, quaking form next to him any easier to endure. He knew "life wasn't fair" and all that jazz, but _**this**_ was ridiculous; unbearable.

"Non-romantic."

He tilted his head but continued to look forward at the glowing screen."Pardon?"

"Non-romantic…that…that's what she called me." He shakily propped himself up on his elbows and looked at Abed. Abed refused to relay the gaze. "I mean… what the hell? Is that…is that even a real word?"

"It is actually, but rarely used. I would have chosen the word 'unromantic'." He replied matter-of-factly. The corresponding shudder he received made him want to kick himself. _**Wrong answer.**_ As Troy's dark eyebrows furrowed and his frown deepened, it took all of Abed's willpower to refrain from covering his eyes; to not see the manifestations of his social inadequacies.

"_**Unromantic**_…" he soberly choked out like it was his new name, "Yeah that sounds…better." In a melodramatic feat, he flipped his body onto his back while heaving a sigh. "I don't get it…I tried doing _**everything**_. I…I mean, I took her for ice cream, I opened _**all**_ the doors for her…I even suggested that _**she**_ tell_** me**_ all her favorite movies before I told her mine!" Abed wasn't sure if Troy was still talking to him or yelling at the Gods who had cursed his life romantically. "I tried to hold her hand and she looked at _**me**_ like _**I **_was__crazy. You- you know what she said Abed? She said 'What is this 1969?' _Imeanwhatthe__**fuck**__?" _His hands jutted up to the ceiling with the last outburst and he sunk back down into the couch. "…then she started pursing her lips together like some kind of duck…" he noted in a significantly quiet voice, "….started…..s-started _**licking**_ the nasty pistachio ice cream from her lips…I mean..I just….I wasn't turned on. I wanna at least _**hold**_ someone's hand before we kiss. I wanna at least know the person's favorite movie before we fool around….so that's what I told her…" he stretched his body to its full length and draped his arms over Abed's lap. "…and that's when she called me non-romantic…..eerm _**unromantic.**_" His limbs became dead weight as if the whole explanation had expensed all of his energy. "….'m started to believe her, man. It never goes right."

A long distressing silence traveled between them and Abed's heart sped up: it was his serve. "…She's…wrong?" he ventured and immediately wished he had stated it with more confidence.

Troy gave dark chuckle, "Nah man…I think that she speaks the truth. I mean…I couldn't even woo the girl who had a crush on me _**all **_of high school."

_But she had to move on…and it took _heaps_ of effort and pain. _Abed deduced that that particular fact was unnecessary to the issue at hand. The dilemma was that, after this recent date, Troy was undoubtedly convinced that he was and would forever be non-romantic….unromantic. Abed slowly grabbed the hand of one of the arms resting on his lap. Troy slid upward slightly to gain a better hold and used his other hand to lightly trace Abed's veins. His fingers leisurely ghosted over the skin tantalizingly. Stopping at Abed's wrist, he began to drawing small circles around it; almost absentmindedly. Abed inhaled shakily and peered down at his friend: eyes closed, diminishing frown, needless to say he looked less distraught. Troy was always capable of making him feel this way…so out of control. Whenever they were _**this**_ close, whenever he _**touched**_ him like this: he could never remember who he was. This person who was _**overwhelmed **_with emotion couldn't possibly be Abed Nadir. His heart lurched forward as Troy continued to innocently trace is name on Abed's sensitive wrist along with other obscure words. With a strained swallow, Abed tried to speak, "…s-see? You are romantic…"

"But this is different," Troy replied quietly. "I mean…this is just what…I don't know. This is just what we _**do**_." The way his grip was tightening on Abed's hand said otherwise; it was as if he were afraid Abed was going to float out of his reach. Troy hastily laced their fingers and inched up further until his head was fully on Abed's lap, bringing their connected hands to his chest. He examined the hand in his possession; delicately shifting it from one hand to the other and attentively grazing his thumb across the knuckles. "How was I supposed to know all these damn rules about romance _**anyway**_? If the rules didn't exists, I wouldn'tve realize how terrible I am at it. I didn't know I tried too hard, or that I was awkward, or on the short-si-"

And then Abed was kissing him. Not being able to get through the list of Troy's romantic short-comings, he leaned down and kissed him. It was a little off-centered, a tad rushed, but Abed's mind went into auto-drive. The smooth, warm lips beneath him went rigid at first, though after a second or two they willing melted in eager participation. Troy angled his head further back and Abed took the opportunity to better align their lips. The contact was explosive; it reverberated through both their bodies. Troy lifted his arms and took a fist full of his best friend's hair; guiding him further down, deeper in a sense of urgency. For a sideways kiss, it was pretty amazing. A sudden shudder traveled through the jock's body and he jerked his lips away steadily gasping for air. After a few moments of painfully awkward silence, Abed's hushed voice broke through in hopes to bring encouragement. "You…you are romantic." He cautiously returned his hands onto his lap and drooped his head, lips still tingling with the last embers of warmth Troy's lips had left. "That….was romantic." He found it difficult to form complex sentences as of late and hoped that that was enough to convince his doubtful friend.

Troy sat up, shifted into the correct seated position, and wearily gazed at him. "Y-you…I don't…this…this doesn't count…" his words were sluggish and reddened with despair, "It never…counted…"Abed wondered if Troy realized that he was gradually gravitating towards him on the couch. Troy leaned further in, closer and closer till their foreheads were literally pressed together. "This…is just…j-just what we _**do**_….that's all…" his harsh whisper wrinkled across Abed's cheek. The proximity nearly intoxicated the young film student into unconsciousness; he hadn't realized he'd been holding his breath. The whole _room_ seemed to be holding its breath, in fact. He looked into his companion's eyes, which were conveniently located inches away from his own.

"So this means….nothing?" He calmly asked, trying to logically grasp Troy's feelings while simultaneously trying to ignore the boys eyelashes fluttering against his face. "This will never….never _did _count as romance?" the vibrations of Abed's voice seemed to be triggering a reaction in Troy. With each word, Troy would inch his chin forward, as if to catch the other's words onto his lip. Troy slowly nodded a "_yes"_ against Abed's forehead, but his pleading eyes held a different answer. The lingering pull on Troy's lips as they gravitated treacherously close cried "_Prove me wrong…__**please.**_" The sealed space between them was heated with both boys' breath, sending Abed's senses into a frenzy. "…Oh…"he murmured directly onto Troy's lips; the two were so close that they were practically kissing already. His ears were drowned with the sluggish pounding of his own heart. "Cool…" Troy hastily nipped the bottom of Abed's lip in reprimand and earned a small gasp."…Cool cool co-" This time it wasn't a quick bite; Troy engulfed, no _devoured_, Abed's entire being. He grabbed Abed's shoulders and steadied him as he forcefully pressed his lips against him; desperate and longing. The sudden urgency and vigor of the action had left Abed paralyzed.

"No…not _**'Cool'.**_" Troy growled after he had finally decided to ease up and breathe. "You wh-..You don't care? You don't feed _**used**_?"

"N-no." Abed replied, trembling and breathless. Abed never felt _used_ when he was with Troy. The countless times the boy trudged in hopeless and rejected, Abed was there to hold him through the night…or be held; to make him feel like he mattered. He didn't mind that. He never felt _used._ He tried swallowing his pulse in the intense stillness, ever aware of the lips that still hovered inches away. Troy's lips kept edging back and forth like the swelling of waves, as if he was internally trying to decide what to do. "I don't feel used…" Abed breathed precariously, "I-If it doesn't matter…then-" That helped the decision go along quickly. Troy seized his lips, swallowing his calculating whisper. Abed was confused; Troy was so inconsistent…not that Abed minded at the moment. Did Troy want him to think that he cared or _not_? The younger boy's tongue began to roughly trace the bottom of his lip, asking..._**demanding **_entrance. Abed obliged and allowed him to explore his mouth with a hungry intensity. The two tongues wrestled in a pulsating, passionate rhythm. Abed's brain was flooded with what sounded like television static. The heat was rising in him like a sauna and _**all **_of his body was fixedly aware. Troy tasted amazing; like cherry chapstick and ice cream. Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream. Funny though, that was _Abed's_ favorite flavor…not his. Abed's arm floated up behind Troy's neck and he intertwined his fingers into the tiny twists in his hair. Troy was licking and sucking at his lips with such fervor that Abed wasn't sure what the phrase "_doesn't matter_" meant anymore. The fluttering of Abed's heart left him panting and gasping into Troy's mouth desperately. He pressed his hands against Troy's chest, disconnecting them. "W-Why?" Abed choked out gently.

Troy was heaving heavily on Abed's chin, once again persistent to eradicate the space between them. He found the small of Abed's back and pulled him closer, fitting him against his own body. "Why what?" he huffed into Abed's neck and then began inspecting it with curious nuzzles.

Abed could feel his friend's heartbeat against his own chest and it was racing about as fast as his. Troy's stubble was gently scraping against his exposed neck; painfully and deliberately. Abed swallowed the devastating whimpers that threatened to escape and tried to maintain a state of composure. "If…it means nothing? Why kiss like _**that**_ when this means nothing?" Troy opened his mouth and began nipping and lapping at his skin. Abed couldn't hold _that_ moan from slipping out.

"Who said it meant _**nothing**_?" he gruffly sighed and let go of his hold on Abed to attend to some _needs_ of his own.

Abed, seeing that all the commotion had resulted in similar _products_, grabbed Troy's hands and returned them onto the small of his back. "You did." He huffed and scooted his pelvis in alignment with Troy's. Troy made no effort to stifle himself and flung his head back with a loud whimper as the two jean-covered erections met. "Well, technically…you never _said _it…" Abed construed aloud while positioning his body more. "I asked and you nodded in _agreeee-_" Damn the friction felt euphoric, not to mention Troy had started bucking like a wild stallion once they were properly aligned. "…A-agreement."

"I _kiss….kissed_ you afterward..don't y-_**oohhshitrightthere-**_" he hissed as Abed expertly traced his zipper along the length of his bulge. " …d-don't you think _that _answer was more convincing?"

"_Nngh _yeah. Ok." The words were pushed through clenched teeth. It really didn't matter what was being said at this point. He was going to convince _him_ of a thing or two. With a few stern shoves, he had Troy on his back on the small couch. He took a firm grasp of Troy's denim covered butt and ambushed his erection with his own, an aerial attack of the best kinds. Lifting his bony hips, he hovered over Troy for a heartbeat; watching him agitatedly thrust upward for more contact. To see his best friend reduced to this shivering, painting, cornucopia of moans and whimpers, concerned him slightly…was this right? He rarely followed his carnal instincts but was _well _aware of them; and what he was aware of now was that this felt _**incredible. **_"I...i-is this ok?" He quietly asked, genuinely serious.

"_Awesome. Yes. __**Please.**_" Troy hissed through his teeth in response. Was that an answer or a request? Abed wasn't sure so he braced himself a while longer before allowing his hips to collapse and they were greeted generously with Troy's. Abed found the rhythm fairly easy, grinding his hips downward and allowing their legs to tangle. Shockwaves traveled through his body as he could _feel_ Troy sliding against him, fitfully pulsating through the fabric. His head swelled with the sound of his own heartbeat so he lowered his head. He caught a glimpse of the smooth brown skin that was illuminated by the television light and decided to plant small kiss there while still keeping up the rhythm.

While kissing his collarbone, Abed could hear the strained whimpers coming from Troy. "_Abed….Abed….__**Abed.**__" _he exhaled his name repeatedly as if it were a mantra or a prayer. It was as if there was a gravitational pull or some other worldly force pulling their hips together. Abed was certain that he couldn't stop if he wanted to. He was _more_ certain that he never _**wanted**_ to stop. Abed wondered if Troy had sensitive ears like he did and cautiously placed the lightest kiss on his earlobe.

And, as strange as it seemed, that was it. In a strangled cry of "_**Shhhaabeed!**_" (which Abed concluded was a hybrid between shit and his name), a fit convulsions traveled through his body and he was reduced into a limp pile underneath Abed. Interestingly enough, watching Troy's eyelids flutter and bottom lip disappear behind his top teeth was enough to bring Abed to the same conclusion. Gulping down a thunderous yell, he let out one raspy, sultry moan and collapsed on top of Troy in a quivering ecstasy.

Neither of them moved for what seemed like an eternity. Abed had considered falling asleep, but felt to dirty to follow through with it. A couple minutes later, Troy coughed and spoke meekly. "At….at least we held hands before….so I'm not breaking my rule…" He gave a pitiful laugh and tried lifting his arms with no avail.

"Mmhm." Abed drowsily replied, tucking his head further into the crook of Troy's neck. "Technically we've been holding hands long before this, so we could have conducted this at anytime earlier and still have been within your guidelines. Also," he inhaled Troy's salty sent and a smile tugged at his lips, "we have the same favorite movie. So it's safe to say that you haven't violated any standards by definition tonight."

"What about you?"

Abed was a little taken back. Sure, he knew this couldn't possibly work. He knew that next week, in reality, Troy would be back at his door from another date, rejected and wanting love. He was well aware that though they were the best of friends, he could only go this far with him. Was he alright with that? Was it emotionally healthy?

"I'm…I'm here for you." When the hell did he _ever_ care about his emotional health? All he had to do was do _this_ (whatever it was) _without_ falling in love or getting seriously attached; big deal. He could handle it. He was Abed Nadir. And if it made Troy happy, made his exploration of the cruel, unforgiving world of dating bearable, then he was more than willing to do it.

"…Thanks Abed…" his voice was scratchy and anchored with drowsiness. He hadn't made an attempt to move for a while and Abed rolled off of him and slid onto the floor.

Luckily the remote was in close proximity and Abed stretched to kick it closer. "Mmhm. No problem." He shut off the television, convinced that _this_ was not a problem; that it never would be.

Troy and Abed were one of the first ones to arrive to the study room that morning. Half a minute or so later the rest of the group migrated in, engulfed in their own conversations, argumentative or otherwise. Shirley, after sweetly commenting on how Annie's cardigan "enhanced her skin color", looked over to the two boys. "Good morning," she sang giving them a Shirley Smile. "You two are sure here earlier than usual." Everyone knew she was referring to Troy, who was known to have troubles getting up in the morning.

"We both had a good night's sleep." Abed explained evenly, observing everyone taking their respected seats.

"Oooh That's ni- Wait…you said _'b-both'_?" every time her voice dropped like that it made Troy internally shiver.

"Yes." Abed couldn't think of a better word to explain, as Shirley put it, "_b-both."_ "Both. As in me and Troy, but I don't see how-"

"_**Okay**_, now that we have a perfectly clear understanding of that situation…Annie was suggesting something outside. And what a crime it would be if we didn't lend her our ears." Cue an exceptional Winger scapegoat.

Annie firstly glared at Jeff for his speech, which was expectantly dripping with sarcasm. Then she sat upright and cleared her throat once she noticed that she had the floor. "Yes well, I thought that maybe we could make it a habit of getting breakfast before studying…together. I saw that many of you left my 'Bangin' Brainpower Breakfast' recipe pamphlets on the table last week and by the way that Britta's stomach is growling I just can't be sure we're all in adequate condition to study."

"I'm in perfect condition to study, Annie." Britta interjected. "You know the Monks used _starvation_ to reach the _highest_ levels of concentration. Besides I eat plenty."

"I don't think fish tacos count, Britta.-"

"Pierce! I'm pretty sure that was gross! Anyway I think it'd be nice to start the day off with a meal together! That way _I_ can be sure that we're all fed and ready to perform at our fullest capacity."

"Annie…" Jeff gave her a quizzical glare, "we're not _race horses_. We're adults. I'm pretty sure that one meal won't catapult us all into a state of higher learning."

"Actually I think it's a good idea." Troy voiced, "I really did skip breakfast …was about to overdose on these Tic Tacs." He flashed the small, square, transparent container.

"_See_ Jeff! " she squealed and sliced her hand methodically in Troy's direction, "I'm preventing an _**overdose. **_Can't you look past your skepticism to see that this is serious?"

"He's using the word "overdose" in its most insubstantial form. I doubt-"

"Well I think it'd be nice!" Shirley cut Jeff off, "And so does Abed. Jeffrey I think you should just stop resisting. Wouldn't it be nice to share a wonderful breakfast with your friends _before_ we start studying?"

"One, tell me where to get a _"wonderful breakfast" _anywhere here in Greendale and I'll be first in line. Two, we never study anyway. Meal or no meal…I don't think there's anything _too _study." The group exchanged worried glances and slowly peaked under the cover of their textbooks. Thankfully words were there; assumingly anthropologic words.

"Looks like Negative Nancy's too fancy to eat mortal food." Britta chuckled and stood. "Actually, I'm with Annie on this one, it'd be a nice change of pace." Jeff stood and followed after her with a snide comment hanging on his tongue and an argument in his heart.

Everyone else followed suit; sighing over the bickering was that rose out the door. "Oh Troy!" Annie chimed after him while they were all exiting. "I forgot to ask, how did the date go?" Abed's eyes widened slightly but he kept a steady pace in front of them. "I was trying to see if you wanted to come over and tell me about it afterwards, but you never answered my text."

"Oh yeah…my phone died."Abed smiled to himself, so _that's_ what was vibrating against his thigh last night. He had thought it was the lasting effects of the sugar from Troy's ice cream. "But the date was…aight. She was kind of a jerk so it wasn't all that great. Called me 'non-romantic.'" He laughed.

"'Non-romantic?'" Annie squeaked, "That's horrible….I mean is that even a _word_? You might have gotten a lucky break on that one, Troy. She probably doesn't have the adequate education…..'non-romantic? My god that's terrible.'" she grimaced.

Troy laughed even harder at Annie's sympathy for his date's education rather than what was actually said to _him_. "Yeah I felt pretty lucky that I didn't stay any longer with her either." He smiled and could just feel Abed smiling in front of him as well.

"Well if you didn't bump uglies with broad, what _did _you do all night?" Pierce called from behind, it didn't count as eavesdropping if he happened to be walking close…with hearing advancing technology. "Cuse you sure as hell didn't come home."

A metaphorical light bulb was struck in the front of the pack. Shirley gasped, stopped, threw a silent prayer up, and continued walking. She was learning more and more that all she _could_ do was pray for her companions.

Breakfast was…as Jeff had predicted it would be. Cold, tasteless, and in some cases _reused_ (it was never natural for cereal to come _**out**_ of the box soggy). Back in the study room, while everyone was unpacking their belongings and settling in, Pierce pulled Troy aside.

"Look, Troy. I'm not the one to chastise people for their certain preferences."

Troy stared at him wide eyed and popped a Tic Tac in his mouth, afraid for him to continue.

"But just know that I'm happy you finally found your rut in this crazy world. Oh and-" He pulled out large, pink, satin laced pillow, "I know last night was _monumental_ for you so I got this for you to sit on."

The blank stare on Troy's face refused to let up.

"Y'know for the throbbing pain. I've heard that it gets easier as time passes, but please, whatever you and A-bed do, keep it behind closed doors."

Troy's stomach dropped in pure terror and he whirled around to return to his seat, hoping that everyone was too preoccupied to noticed his and Pierce's little exchange. Luckily, only Abed was peering their way. A few minutes into the study session he discreetly slid Abed a note.

_-Dude that was crazy._ _Do you __**know**__ what he was saying to me over there?_

Abed quickly scribbled something down and returned it.

_-No. But judging from that pillow and the fact that Shirley keeps glaring at us, it's not hard to guess._

_-What should we do? _

_-Nothing._

_-…Oh…Well did you see how ridiculous that pillow looked? Haha why does Pierce even have that? To entice the ladies? _

_-I agree, it's strange. I doubt that'd work on any kind of female._

_-I'd be sorry for Pierce if it __**did**__ work on someone…it'd have to be a pretty non-romantic person._

He grabbed the note back, scratched out "non-romantic" and replaced it with "unromantic" earning a small chuckle from Abed.

_-Good thing we both hate it. According to your standard, we must be pretty romantic then. _

Troy smiled, it faltered a bit when he looked up to see Pierce stroking the satin pillow and staring at him.

_-Yeah thank goodness. I don't think you could get any more "non-romantic" than that._

Troy was sure that Pierce wasn't going to let up when they got home, but a couple of dates and a couple of porn recommendations and then he'd be fine. And as for he and Abed? Well the same plan could work for both situations, actually.

_**A/n: **_ _This was my first attempt at writing something…how you say 'raunchy' (I personally hate that word). I would __**really**__ appreciate comments! Thank you! ~Trxie~_


End file.
